We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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