your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
We need to rekindle our bromance
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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