Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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