Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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