Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize