Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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