they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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