My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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