grandma shit on top of the toilet
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
