How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
