Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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