It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You need a sexual gate keeper
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
