I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
