a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
there is puke in my bra ... again
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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