i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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