Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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