She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
this will be a night to untag.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Randomize
