Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
