Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Randomize
