I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
