Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
