finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
