CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
My day in three words: secret purse cake
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I touched a dick in church today
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
