I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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