Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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