He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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