We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
