He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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