What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I skipped work to stalk him.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
