My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
