I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
