Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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