My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
