What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
