Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
