i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Boobs are out for the taking
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
