# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
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