My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
