dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
