woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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