on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
