what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
