shes about as inviting as chlamydia
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
