I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
