how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Just pee around me
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize