maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize