it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
