I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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