i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Too much gin, very little bucket
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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