I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
