Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I am one with the molecules
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize